A Humbling Time, Surrendering and the Best Use for Space Blankets

 

And hello.

I’ve got a bazillion deep thoughts going on at the moment and a very painful throbbing hip that I’m not really ready to discuss, but I ran the Carlsbad Half Marathon this morning.

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I kind of knew going in that I still just wasn’t in the racing mindset. Last year did me in I think, but I always set my expectations on myself a little to high. Last year I was in a much different place- not working full time, running a lot more miles, getting a lot of cross training in, etc.

This year was just a bit different. Gosh darn it, it’s tough to not be hard on yourself, isn’t it? I’m disappointed with my time as I felt like I should have done better, but I do feel that I did the best with what I had this morning.

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I swear I learn a few more life lessons every time I cross that finish line. Today there were a few extra lessons along the way.

I’ll get a full recap on here tomorrow, but I finished in 1:38:32. I actually felt really good the whole race, just slowed down at the end and was dealing with a little leg/hip pain. Pretty funny that 3 years ago I ran a half marathon faster than that pushing a double stroller with the boys. Okay, not funny, humbling, but I’m trying to take things in stride.

I ran smart today though and really loved the half marathon distance on this course. It’s been awhile since I’ve run just the half.

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I also just have to say that Coach Jason really should have kicked me to the curb months ago, but that guy hasn’t given up on me yet. I’m a horrible person to try to coach (I’ve been told I’m not coachable many times in my life).

I realized today that I’m like that because I’m not good at trusting people. I never have been and have always been on my own and guarded myself in one way or another. It’s fear. You know, if you don’t open that door to make yourself vulnerable, well, then you don’t risk anything or lose anything.

I’ve always played it on the safe side and been one to try to prove myself on my own. I’ve also never really been a great athlete and had to work hard in pretty much everything. I’m used to being the underdog.

The whole trusting and listening to others issue isn’t just with athletics, but with pretty much everything in life for me.

I’m not sure why I’m putting this all out on the table right now, but after countless undeserved encouraging texts last night from Coach Jason with advice and what pace I should try to run, etc., I realized I really need to just trust the people in my life that are there to help, you know?

The phrase “surrender control” was used in talking about future training leading into Boston. It hit home because I need to “surrender control” with quite a few other things in life to a certain someone upstairs that has blessed our family in so many ways as of late.

Okay, man, a little too much sharing, but hopefully I’m not alone in some of this and some of you can relate.

 

In other light-hearted news, I attempted to show Mom how to use The Stick once I got home, but it didn’t go over so well.

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Ha ha.

And the boys asked their usually questions:

Mommy did you win? NO.

Mommy did you get treats at your race? YES.

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Just in case you need an idea for the space blankets they give you at the end of the race, they make the perfect curtains for magic shows.

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You’re welcome.

 

Hope you had a great weekend.

 

Did anyone else race?

Anyone else need to “surrender control” with anything in life? (My list is pretty long.)

What’s the best thing ever you’ve done with a space blanket?

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Comments

  1. 1

    Is it weird that I’m kind of jealous of space blankets? I haven’t run a race where I got one yet, but I really want one 🙂

  2. 2
    Erica says:

    I just wanted to let you know I think you’re awesome 🙂

  3. 3
    Cher Rezac says:

    I was thinking your gonna say like 1:50 or something(my PR is 2:00 for a half) but 1:38 thats awesome!!! Give yourself LOTS of credit-your plate is FULL! And your living a very Happy Life! Life is Good!

  4. 4
    Kim says:

    I’m sorry that the race didn’t end in such a great way. And, I hope that the leg/hip pain isn’t anything major – take care of yourself!!!!

  5. 5
    Molly says:

    I kept my space blanket even though I can’t think of anything to do with it. I raced the Carlsbad half marathon today and I’m coming off of an injury so during the race I had so much fun just being able to run after not being sure if I would heal in time and not worry about my pace or time. Although once the race was over I couldn’t help but be a little disappointed that my pace was about 30 seconds per mile slower than normal, even though I knew going into it that my speed isn’t where it usually is. It seems like a lot of runners do the same thing. I need to work on having a more positive attitude about these things. Anyways, way to go with your run! I hope your hip is already feeling better 🙂

  6. 6
    Laura says:

    I know you’re a speedy runner, and to me a 1:38 half Is speedy, but I’m sorry you didn’t have the race you wanted. And holy moly, you’ve ran a faster half pushing a double jogger?!?! That is seriously impressive!

    Hope your hip is okay, take care.

  7. 7
    Aimie C says:

    I think you are awesome and I really appreciate your honesty. Of course your race time sounds fast to me but we all have our own expectations. I am also super hard on myself and always feel so jealous of the people that say they don’t care what their time is, and that are just happy to be out there running. Too competitive here to be that person.
    It is So true that running really teaches us a lot of good life lessons. Rest up and I hope that your pains are temporary.

  8. 8
    Jenny says:

    Anyone else need to “surrender control” with anything in life? YEP!!! An my list is very long as well.

    Since a half in November I have ITBS that will NOT go away. I have another race in 5 weeks and cannot run over 2 miles without pain. It even hurts when I am not running now. I took 2 weeks off, I foam roll, stretch, etc. Nothing is helping…. Just one of the many things getting me down in the running area.

    Hang in there lady!! And thanks for sharing because it is nice to know that even awesome runners such as yourself has these times just like us 🙂

    Jenny

  9. 9
    Alicia says:

    “It’s been awhile since I’ve run just the half.” Um, Ouch to us that run “just the half.”

    Good luck with your injury, I hope you are back at it quickly and feeling strong!

    • 9.1
      STUFT Mama says:

      Totally didn’t mean it to sound like that Alicia. I’ve just run this particular full marathon for the past four years, so it was weird to run the half distance. I liked it better. Ha ha.

  10. 10

    Jason keeps stashing those blankets in our cars in case of emergency. I could build a tent with them at this point 😉 And I’m waiving my hands over here on needing to let go of control!

  11. 11
    Kathy says:

    It’s so funny to hear how you have slowed down when in reality if I ran what you run I would think I was “Super Fly” that’s fast believe me!! Since I haven’t felt good running in a long time I have been biking a lot more and not doing anything. (They say REST, I REST!)

    Slowly I tried it again….11 minute mile girl and it felt great…no pain ….. it’s not about the time it’s about the fun and the way you feel doing it….as I remind myself there are those who would love to do 11 minute miles too…all about perspective!! But you know that….

  12. 12
    Heather says:

    I totally get the disappointment you feel when you don’t meet your own expectations in a race…or in life for that matter. I’m in the same boat in terms of dealing with change…new position at work has decreased my training time substantially, and I’m having to have a mind shift in how I think about training, races, etc. I think in the long run, it will lead to a more balanced lifestyle, but boy it’s hard. You’ve got this, Kristin. You will figure out the balance by learning to let go, and then everything will fall into place, including faster race times again! 🙂 Be patient with yourself…you’re awesome!

  13. 13
    Becky says:

    I think every one of us has a lot in common with this theme. I have a thought though, especially since you said “last year did me in”. I think you do too many marathons/races and you’re just plain tired. I’ve done the same thing 2013-14 so I speak from experience. Racing too often takes away the “race-ness” of it. You know the deal: you want to set a goal and work towards that one goal, but you end up throwing other races in there along the way, as your out for not meeting that goal because, let’s face it, it’s a really vulnerable feeling to lay it all on that one day. I know I sandbag a lot, telling myself that races don’t really matter because I’ve done this other race, or I was tired because I didn’t taper, etc. I decided doing too many races, even though I love that finish line high, is just not what I want. Instead, I chucked that old habit, decided to make a lofty goal for my next marathon (Houston, which was yesterday), put my head down and trained like a maniac, and I wasn’t going to let anything scare me out of it or dilute my effortsby sticking in a half or other race along the way. Well, I went for it yesterday and I ran 3:09, putting it all out there and not caring if I bonked/blacked out/died. A 14 minute PR. I still can’t believe it. It was scary for me but I decided, what the heck? So my advice for Boston is you do the same. Put your head down and listen to your coach. If you really want it to be a good race, you have to let all those other races go.

    • 13.1
      STUFT Mama says:

      Time out- BECKY you got a 3:09?????? That is soooooo awesome! I’m so happy for you! And right before your birthday too, right? Aren’t we birthday twins?
      Thanks sooo much for your advice. It’s so good to hear it from someone who knows exactly where I’m coming from. YOU hit the nail right on the head. I don’t do well with pressure and putting it all out there. Fear always hold me back.
      YOU ARE AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to repost exactly what you wrote right here. Seriously.

      • Becky says:

        Yes, it was a great bday treat! (11 days and I turn 40, owie. You’re my younger bday twin!) Hang in there, friend. You can repost what I wrote anytime. Sometimes it takes someone telling you can do something in order for you to believe you can actually do it. My training partner has believed all along that I had that in me, I just needed to go for it. If I can do it, then hell yea you can do it, too. XOXO

  14. 14
    Emily says:

    The shift in life to working full time is freaking HARD!!! After spending years working part-time after having my kids, it’s been a total shock to my system, both personally and athletically. While I am nowhere near as fast or fit as you, I totally sympathize with you during this transition. It’s hard. So don’t be hard on yourself. (I know… easier said than done.) I hope to see a happy Stuft toeing the line at the end of February! 😉

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